In the Beginning was Nothing:
A Creation Story for Young Materialists

Apologetics — By Joe Carter on January 10, 2007 at 2:05 am

[Note: Here at EO I’ve decided to honor my favorite bizarre worldview by hosting an Atheism Appreciation Week. For the rest of the week I’ll have posts dedicated to atheism and its related beliefs.]
Throughout history children have been awed and thrilled by retellings of their culture’s creation story. Aztec’s would tell of the Lady of the Skirt of Snakes, Phoenicians about the Zophashamin, and Jews and Christians about the one true God — Jehovah. But there is one unfortunate group — the children of materialists — that has no creation myth to call its own. When an inquisitive tyke asks who created the sun, the animals, and mankind, their materialist parents can only tell them to read a book by Carl Sagan or Richard Dawkins.
No child, though, should have to go without an answer which is why I’ve decided to take the elements of materialism and shape them into an accurate, though mythic, narrative. This is what our culture has been missing for far too long — a creation story for young materialists.

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In the beginning was Nothing and Nothing created Everything. When Nothing decided to create Everything, she filled a tiny dot with Time, Chance, and Everything and had it explode. The explosion spread Everything into Everywhere carrying Time and Chance with it to keep it company. The three stretched out together leaving bits of themselves wherever they went. One of those places was the planet Earth.
For no particular Reason — for Reason is rarely particular — Time and Chance took a liking to this wet little blue rock and so decided to stick around and see what adventures they might have. The pair thought the Earth was intriguing and pretty, but also rather dull and static. They fixed upon an idea to change Everything (just a little) by creating a special Something. Time and Chance roamed the planet, splashing through the oceans and scampering through the mud, in search of materials. But though they looked Everywhere there was a Missing Ingredient that they needed in order to make a Something that could create more of the same Somethings.
They called to their friend Everything to help. Since Everything had been Everywhere she would no doubt be able to find the Missing Ingredient. And indeed she did, hidden away in a small alcove called Somewhere, Everything found what Time and Chance had needed all along: Information. Everything put the Information on a piece of ice and rock that happened to be passing by the planet Pluto and sent it back to her friends on Earth.
Now that they had Information, Time and Chance were finally able to create a self-replicating Something which they called Life. Once they created the Life they found that it not only became more Somethings it began to become Otherthings too! The Somethings and the Otherthings began to fill all the Earth — from the bottom of the oceans to the top of the sky. Their creation, which began as a single Something eventually became millions of Otherthings.


Time and Chance, though, where the bickering sort and were constantly feuding over which of them was the most powerful. One day they began to argue over who had been most responsible for creating Life. Everything (who was constantly eavesdropping) overheard the spat and suggested that they settle the debate by putting their creative skills to work on a new creature called Man. They all thought is was a splendid plan – Man was a dull, hairy beast who would indeed provide a suitable challenge – and began to boast about who could create an ability, which they called Consciousness, that would allow Man to be aware of Chance, Time, Everything, and Nothing.
Chance, who had always been a bit of a dawdler, got off to a slow start so it was Time, who never rested, that was able to complete the task first. Time rushed around, filling the gooey matter inside each Man’s head with Consciousness. But as he was gloating over his victory he noticed a strange reaction. When Man could see that Everything had been created by Time, Chance, and Nothing his Consciousness would fill up with Despair.
Chance immediately saw a solution to the problem and used the remaining materials she was using to make Consciousness to create Beliefs. When Chance mixed Beliefs into the grey goo, Man stopped filling with Despair and started creating his own Illusions. These Illusions took various forms — God, Purpose, Meaning — but they were almost always effective in preventing Man from filling up with Despair.
Nothing, who tended to be rather forgetful, remembered her creation and decided to take a look around Everything. When she saw what Time and Chance had done on planet Earth she was mildly amused but forbid them to fill any more creatures with Consciousness or Beliefs (which is why Man is the only Something that has both). But Nothing took a fancy to Man and told Time and Chance that when each one’s Life ran out that she would take him or her and make them into Nothing too.
And that is why, my young friends, when Man loses his Life he goes from being a Something created by Time and Chance into becoming like his creator – Nothing.
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  • http://www.dailyduck.blogspot.com Robert Duquette

    John Salmon writes:
    It seems to me that if life is “random and meaningless”, then it must ultimately be foolish. Even the “selfish gene” concept can’t be enough-why should I care about who my genes are passed on to? I won’t exist in any form, in a purely materialistic universe.
    There’s a couple of ways to address this. First, it is possible that there is a god and that he created the universe, you and me for a purpose, but that purpose might not be something that would be meaningful to us. Theists conflate two separate ideas when they talk about a purposeful universe, that it was created by an intelligent being, and that they will have a life after death. There is no logical reason to assume that god’s purpose includes your eternal life. The latter doesn’t follow from the former.
    Secondly, for a person to find meaning and purpose in life doesn’t depend on whether the universe was created with meaning or purpose. For all we know meaning, like personhood, is solely an artifact of our existence and may have no meaning at the level of the universe. Maybe it does, but I’m not holding my breath for a voice out of the blue to explain it to me.
    Finding meaning in life is a practical problem for every person. Meaning and purpose are human requirements, it is part of our nature to seek them. It is not something bestowed upon us or something we get from the environment like air or water, it is something we create for ourselves. The best writer on meaning has to be Victor Frankl. Frankl was a holocaust survivor, and he observed that even in the most harsh circumstances people are able to create meaning in order to endure their suffering. Indeed, he observed that it is only those who were able to create meaning who survived.
    Now whether the universe has a meaning or not it is there, and I exist. It is a given. If I want to survive I have to find meaning in my existence. And I do. There is no reason that I have to live forever in order to find meaning, a finite life is good. It is better than no life.
    Let me ask you one question: if you can’t find meaning in a finite life, what makes you think you will find an infinite life meaningful? Lets phrase this in a mathematical equation where L is some finite interval of life, and M(L) is the meaning function that determines the meaning quantity of that life interval. So if finite life is meaningless we have: M(L) = 0
    But what happens if we multiply M(L) by infinity, how much meaning is there. Multiplying both sides by infinity (I) we get: M(L)*I = 0*I
    And as we know from math class,anything times zero equals zero. So the challenge of finding meaning in life is the challenge of finding meaning in a moment. If you can do that, you can live a meaningful life of whatever length. If you can’t, then you’ll never find meaning no matter how much life you are given.

  • RB

    Robert D.,
    Perhaps you are correct. Perhaps the meaning in the moment is what God is all about. Perhaps He wishes us all to experience that moment (and the moment is eternal), through intellect and teaching, and the things that are going on now forvever, and for His eternal love expressed to us through Jesus.

  • RB

    Matthew,
    I would also point out that you allow this for your world view:
    “Arthur Conant Doyle had Sherlock Holmes observe that, “When you have eliminated all which is impossible, then whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.”
    But you deny it to the ones here that argue the other side..

  • rhys

    I’ve been an atheist for quite a few years now, but after reading that satire it’s pointed out the ridiculousness of my beliefs.
    Something from nothing. ha! what was i thinking..
    Just one question before my transition to theism is complete.
    Where did God come from?

  • RB

    rhys,
    Where did matter, time, and chance come from?
    It’s and endless circle, aye?

  • rhys

    How about..it just always existed..?

  • Olivia

    You should check out http://www.oltiv.org for some very compelling discussions on this and other topics

  • Olivia

    You should check out http://www.oltiv.org for some very compelling discussions on this and other topics

  • Olivia

    You should check out http://www.oltiv.org for some very compelling discussions on this and other topics

  • Olivia

    You should check out http://www.oltiv.org for some very compelling discussions on this and other topics

  • Thorngod

    Folks, the phrase “In the beginning” is meaningless in reference to what is. If by “nothing” or “nothingness” or such is meant “utter absence of anything,” then the notion is absurd. No scintilla of anything could have arisen from
    nothing at all. To the Theist, of course, there’s no problem, and everything is created in God’s and RB’s “blink of an eye.” Prior to this event, nothing was (in the material sense)–which raises some interesting questions.
    If God created the universe, then theoretically we could measure the elapsed time since creation; the world, in other words, has existed a definite number of days, an exact number of statable hours and minutes. Whether it was 13½ billion years, or Bishop Usher’s mere 6,000 and a few, makes vanishingly little difference as against God’s eternity. In that context, we can say that the universe was created just a moment ago. That being the case, I would ask just what the Creator might have been doing throughout eternity, since he existed forever before the creation. Did God no know his own mind?
    Another thing. If I am to accept the theist’s version of isness, then, prior to creation of the world, there was only God. God was all. There could have been no “other” or “outer.” From what, then, did he create? He could only have created from himself, from Godstuff. There is no getting around this one, folks. I suggest you read Spinoza, for you have been worshipping a false god.
    There was no “beginning.” That is a concept derived from ordinary experience, in which everything deteriorates and new forms emerge or are invented. Yet every half-educated person understands, however vaguely, that this is illusory; it is merely a conversion from one form to another, from one state of mass and energy to another. Nothing excapes from existence; “where,” after all, would it go? Counterwise, nothing arises from nowhence. As impossible as it is for us transcient beings to imagine “eternity” or “always” or “foreverness,” such is necessarily the case.
    Democritis realized this 2400 years ago. Most intelligent humans today should not find it too difficult to exercise the modest amount of brain power required to establish that necessary conclusion.
    God belief and creation myths are as old as our race, and I doubt they will ever entirely disappear. I’m not sure I would want them to. Would life still be as entertaining? Odd, how pounding on the heads of “believers” is so much more fun than pounding on actual rocks.

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  • LaughAtTheBible

    First of all. Saying I DON’T KNOW is better than telling an unproved tale of epic ridiculousness. In saying I don’t know, you acknowledge that mankind’s knowledge is incomplete and that there are more answers to discover. Being content with a theological story of creation is not the path to enlightenment. Enlightenment is the state of knowing everything. While science will never completely enlighten us, it will get us as close as possible (for the calculus geeks like me, enlightenment is a limit).

    Second, that is a horrid misrepresentation of the big bang theory. A common misconception is that there was nothing before the big bang. There is evidence that matter existed before the big bang, which caused the universe to occur. While this is quite dandy, it is not enough for theists. It is not enough for scientists, but they try to expand upon it, not refute it because it hasn’t been proved (and no, you can’t use that argument, because the bang actually has evidence, unlike creationism).

    I’ve said this before, and i’ll say it again. JUST BECAUSE WE DON’T HAVE ENOUGH INFORMATION TO PROVE THE ORIGIN OF THE UNIVERSE WITHOUT REFERRING TO GOD, DOESN’T MEAN THERE ISN’T A SCIENTIFIC EXPLANATION FOR LIFE, THE UNIVERSE, AND EVERYTHING.

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